Clumsy? Avoid cutting yourself while slicing vegetables by getting someone else to hold them while you chop away. LOL
Avoid arguments with the Mrs. about lifting the toilet seat by simply using
the sink. LOL
A mouse trap, placed on top of your alarm clock, will prevent you from rolling over and going back to sleep when you hit the snooze button. LOL
If you have a bad cough, take a large dose of laxatives, then you will be afraid to cough. LOL
Have a bad toothache? Hit your thumb with a hammer, then you will forget about the toothache. LOLNever, under any circumstances, take a sleeping pill and a laxative on the same night. LOL
Never lick a steak knife. LOL
When life hands you lemons, grab the tequila and the salt! LOL
Be really good to your family and friends. You never know when you are going to need them to empty your bedpan. LOL
